Teen Cyber-Relationship Addiction

Suffocation manuscript is about 55% of the way through editorial. Holodomor manuscript, first-draft mode, is a mess on the floor. I’ll be trucking through chapter-arrangement and cutting/adding scenes, while waiting for the next round of edits for Suffocation.

Life at casa-Crat has gone back to some semblance of normal. Ian’s girlfriend now lives with her dad, and he’s working on obtaining his driver’s license so he can get a better job, and his own place to live in.

Some deeply personal things ahead…

We encountered a problem with Mag that we’re all trying to work out.

When Mag stepped up and revealed their non-binary nature to the world, it wasn’t easy. Texas is conservative, and young conservative people can be the most ignorant people on the planet. Mag turned to the internet to help with the stress and anxiety of living around others that misgender, misalign, and misunderstand. In the last few years, Mag’s become a belligerent, SJW-type incapable of tolerating any ‘gray areas’ in anyone, young or old. On the net, this is fine—in real life, around living breathing people, this world-view doesn’t quite lend itself to healthy relationships.

Any degree of racist, -phobic, or sexist comments or attitudes, met with a severe verbal hammering from Mag. Naturally, this led to a loss of friends.

While I have no room in my life for racist, phobic, or sexist people, I’m an adult—dealing with other adults that by now, should know better in their beliefs. Being a teen is a life-learning process. If you’re a young person saying racist things, and someone calls you out on it, learn from your mistake, and change. Teens make mistakes. As a young person, you can cut those friends out after you’ve expressed your opinion on their words, and they don’t feel they’ve done anything wrong. Yes, this a person you could do without.

Yet Mag reached a point where everything on the planet had something wrong with it; everyone’s words was suspect, and open to criticism–none of it good, all of it angry. Mag’s peers walked on eggshells around Mag, fearing if they said something wrong, Mag would verbally hammer them. Mag became a toxic person to be around, because they spent nearly every day on the net, expressing their comments with their thumbs, instead of their voice.

When I suggested they cut down on the internet, an explosion of emotion erupted, and I was told ‘my only real friends are online.’ These online friends were all trans-teens like Mag. They were rightfully angry and anxious because real life was fraught with sexist, stupid, phobic, people–some of whom were their own family. Online had been a place where they could vent with others like themselves, but so much time was spent venting, no time was spent living.

Cyber-relationship addiction destroyed nearly all their real-life relationships, and my spouse and I stepped in when Mag was ready to hear what we had to say.

It’s now one day at a time…


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